A is for Anger: recipes, remedies, rituals and resources for dealing with Anger

Welcome to the Alphabet series! Every other week we will be tackling a letter of the alphabet and connecting that letter with a physical, emotional and/or spiritual ailment that impacts us individually and as a community. We will gather as many recipes, rituals, remedies and resources as we can to support the healing of these ailments.  This is not by any means a comprehensive list, but a working list of possible things that can reinforce and engage healing. Please be sure to consult your doctor/practitioner/spiritual guide/intuition before using any of these therapies. We are all different and respond uniquely to various healing methods. Its important to only use what is meant for you specifically. Lets kick things of with the letter A. A is for Anger!!!

“And true, sometimes it seems that anger alone keeps me alive; it burns with a bright and undiminished flame. Yet anger, like guilt, is an incomplete form of human knowledge. More useful than hatred, but still limited. Anger is useful to help clarify our differences, but in the long run, strength that is bred by anger alone is a blind force which cannot create the future. It can only demolish the past. Such strength does not focus on what lies ahead, but upon what lies behind, upon what created it – hatred. And hatred is a deathwish for the hated, not a lifewish for anything else.”

~Audre Lorde


We are all recipients and givers of anger. To feel anger is normal and a natural expression of emotion. Anger, used effectively, can be an incredible atlas of discovery. It can help us uncover unhealthy patterns, highlight areas in our lives that need change,  open us up to stand up for ourselves and our communities and help us release parts of ourselves that have been clogged down. On the flip side, anger can be a beaaasssstt!!! Allowed to run rampant,  it can manifest violently in our physical and spiritual selves and cause damaging rippling effects in our relationships with friends, family, strangers and the earth. The trick to making anger work for us, is to find a balance of expressing anger without causing harm to yourself and/or others. How do we do that? Well, It helps to start from the root of what causes our anger and work our way up, picking up answers along the way.

Potential Ingredients: What causes Anger? 

  • Unaddressed emotions
  • Frustration
  • Your loud ass neighbor who refuses to respect silence
  • Stressful environments ie people, workspaces, relationships, living spaces
  • Change that feels out of our control
  • Oppression
  • Unforgiveness of yourself and/or others
  • Abuse
  • Physical, emotional and/or spiritual pain
  • Not feeling heard/seen
  • Any part of you being disrespected
  • Self judgement
  • Self rejection
  • Cultural and societal messages about anger
  • Biased information processing
  • Fear
  • Adrenal release

Physical and Spiritual manifestations

Anger can manifest in any number of ways. Physically, people may experience headaches, dizziness, stomach aches, rapid heart beat, pain in isolated parts of the body, sweating. I personally experience hot ears and sweat palms. If I’m  hella angry, I have a hard time articulating my thoughts. People may also notice that they begin to pace, speak aggressively, act abrasively, raise their voice, feel anxious. Spiritually, folks might feel ungrounded, unbalanced, chaotic and foggy. Some folks might feel a deep sense of clarity. Its important to note that that these physical manifestations can also be indications of other emotional, physical and/or spiritual issues. Everybody’s expression of anger is different. Whats most important is that when anger arises, its important to pay attention to how your body physically expresses and stores it. It is important that we deal with our anger so that it does not escalate to place that is destructive to ourselves or others. If you find yourself experiencing difficulty breathing, chest pain, hurting yourself or another person, getting into verbal and physical fights, it is important to seek the help of a professional who can support your healing.

Recipes & Remedies 

  • Steep 1/2 teaspoon of chamomile and 1 tablespoon of finely chopped cilantro leaves in hot water for 10 minutes. Allow the tea to cool, strain and sip slowly.
  • Reduce and/or eliminate sugar in your diet. Healthy fruits and vegetables can help regulate moods.
  • Rose essential oil has been a successful treatment for anger. Inhale it directly from a bottle or put a few drops on the pulse points of your wrist. You can also add a few drops in a candle diffuser and burn it in your preferred space.
  • Another helpful essential oil is sandalwood. Dab a drop of it on the middle of your forehead, throat, breastbone, temple, and wrists.
  • Use guided imagery to imagine yourself expressing your anger to the person or thing you are annoyed with
  • Listen to relaxing and calming music.
  • Practice a breathing meditation for at least 10 minutes, certain forms of pranayama are particularly helpful
  • Make an anger chili.
  • LET IT OUT!!!!Find a productive way to express your anger;  dance, writing, singing, being a part of an organizing campaign for change, visual art, screaming at the top of your lungs, beating a punching bag etc
  • Come up with a safe and effective action plan to implement when you get angry. Identify ways you can be proactive rather than reactive.
  • As a community, it is important to support folks dealing with anger with as much compassion and non-judgement as possible.


  • Practice a letting go ritual to release anger that is being destructive in your life.
  • Create time and space with a friend and/or community to share the source of your anger.
  • Participate in a grieving ritual. The root of a lot of anger we experience is deeply connected to unacknowledged and unresolved grief. The better we are at grieving, the less likely anger arising from this greif can have a negative impact on our lives.

Free to Low cost Resources

  • Emotions Anonymous,a twelve-step organization, similar to Alcoholics Anonymous, composed of people who come together in weekly meetings for the purpose of working toward recovery from emotional difficulties
  • Pathways to Peaceoffers peer education, support, and structured workbook focus groups free of charge for people who have a problem with anger. Groups meet regularly to help each other understand the nature of anger and rage and to change abusive and violent behaviors.
  • Re-evaluation counseling, a process whereby people of all ages and of all backgrounds can learn how to exchange effective help with each other in order to free themselves from the effects of past distress experiences.
Helpful links and books


what are some of your recipes, rituals, remedies and resources for dealing with anger?

2 comments on “A is for Anger: recipes, remedies, rituals and resources for dealing with Anger

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