The process of letting go is an endless journey, whether you feel inspired to focus on it at the turn of a new year, on your birthday or the birth of a new moment. It is an ongoing process that can be done at any time. I often am doing some kind of letting go ritual. The vitality of my life depends on it. I want my life to be as infinite and limitless and expansive as possible. When I choose to hold unto negative habit patterns, toxic relationships, stressful environments, trifling thought patterns, I do little to serve my happiness, my growth and my abundance. Letting go can be hard and hella scary. Pain in all of its manifestations: anger, fear, sadness, insecurity, anxiety: arise and call for my full attention. Facing this pain takes commitment, energy, courage and focus. I find that much of what I need to release is deeply rooted in how I’ve functioned my whole life and often pushes me to come to terms with areas in my life that I’ve buried, been scared to tackle, and are just down right triggering.
But thank goodness!!! healing and transformation also lie in these spaces. Letting go is an active choice to be compassionate with ourselves and focus on what is possible, and necessary and good in our lives and release all that cuts us from our freedom. It allows us to create more room for the possibilities laying within us and to open the doors to the many opportunities that await us.
Letting go does not mean we ignore issues that have happened or are happening in our lives. It is about change and taking responsibility. It honors what has come, learns from the past and creates healthy ways to undo the negative grip toxic spaces have had on our lives. It is a constant reunion and forgiveness of yourself.
Each moment is an opportunity to let go. One of my favorite ways to release that which does not serve me is to BREATHE! Our breathe is our deepest, most authentic connection to the Divine, to our good, to our most vital source of energy, without it we die. Breath focuses us on the present moment. I like imagining all the amazing things I want in my life as I breathe in. As I breathe out, I release any negativity I want transformed. I also looove to dance as a letting go ritual. I’ve gone as far as to make a letting-go soundtrack. As I dance to it, I imagine shaking off and releasing all that needs to be shifted and transformed in my life.
Here are a couple of songs on my “Letting Go” Soundtrack
“Let Go” by Frou Frou
Here is another “Letting Go” ritual that i’ve done with loved ones
- a commitment to want to let go
- friends, family, loved ones you trust and feel safe with. Their presence is necessary in amplifying the energy around letting go. They can also serve as an accountability team for you as you process letting go
- Sacred space, anywhere that inspires you and makes you feel comfortable being honest with yourself
- Items to put in the space that evoke inspiration, peace, safety and release. Also bring items that embody the life you want to live I love having sage, candles, stones (heart shaped ones are my favorite), seashells, pictures of healing yoga poses, pictures of mandalas, incense, essential oils, water
- healing songs
- dried sage
- Gather all the necessary ingredients. Make sure you plan ahead so that all that you need is in the space
- Begin with clearing your space of any negative energy by burning some sage. Many people have different ways of doing this. Here is a sample
- Come together in a circle. Give gratitude for each person’s presence. Together, share and agree on what you want the space to feel and look like for everyone, so that each person feels comfortable being honest with themselves and each other . Share what your intentions are for your time together.
- Create your sacred space. Make sure you remove any distractions ie cell phones
- Take a few minutes to quietly reflect on what you want to release (bad habits, patterns, health issues, negative relationships, self esteem issues, an unfufilling career, lack of self care, conflict) Think about what might be holding you back from releasing these things 100%. Spend as much time in reflection as you need to allow the answer to these questions to arise.
- Be compassionate with yourself and each other as you reflect on what you need to release. Be open to looking honestly at where you may be holding fear, doubt, hate, self-deprecation. If you get emotional, pay attention to what is coming up for you. allow the emotions that arise to move through your body, without judgement or attachment. But make sure you do not drown in this space of pain. Be patient as it takes its course and reveals more on how and what you need to heal. Take your time. Do not rush your own process out of fear or doubt.
- Accept responsibility for your role in shaping what needs to be released. Do not confuse this with victimizing or judging yourself. We are all human. We make mistakes. Acknowledging your role only spotlights the areas that need more love in the future. This is helpful! Reflect on what you’ve learned from its passing through your life. In what ways have you grown? They may be things you learned about your needs, your strengths, your spaces to expand your love. Spaces we need to let go of are teachable openings to clear the clutter and let the light in
- One by one, share what you want to let go with your circle of loved ones. How you share is up to you. it can be in writing, in song, in chant, with movement…whatever best amplifies your own voice in that moment. Regardless of how you share it, make sure you write it down as well. As each person shares, allow time and space for everyone in the group to offer their support and affirmation to each person. You can create a saying to share each time someone enters the circle and releases. I like “You are Free, You are Unlimited” , Use names if that feels comfortable :”Adaku is Free, Adaku is Unlimiited”.
- Collect all the papers that contain what you need to release and place them in a non-flammable container. Burn the papers. As you watch the papers burn, chant “I release you. You are free. I am free. You are transformed. I am transformed”
- Now visualize how you want to transform that which you are releasing. Be truthful and very specific about what you want to transform about what you desire. For instance, I want to transform being stressed out at work to creating a healthy schedule.
- Once you’ve come up with these areas of transformation, share them with each other.
- Breathe in these intentions
- Celebrate this release in some way…sing together, dance together, scream together.
- Figure out a process of accountability and checking in with each other around what you each released
- Give gratitude again and always to yourself and each other
What are some of your “letting go” recipe and rituals? Share them with us